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Dreaded first draft

Writing is awesome, its a hobby that actively encourages you to hide away in your room, avoid humans and day dream spending days in your own private world hidden in the depths of your mind.

It's fantastic!

However, writers are a strange type of creature. You see a writer will hide away in a comfy cocoon of blankets, pillows, jogger and hoodies, surrounded by unhealthy snacks and craving coffee, hissing at anyone who dares goes near their beloved laptop.

This creature avoids leaving its cocoon and venturing into the bright lights of the real world, preferring to communicate through texts and the Internet because humans are scary creatures.

A writer is a self destructive creature, spending hours smothered in doubt and self hate as they are convinced that their work is dirt. They will surround themselves in isolation trying to create the perfect book, pouring their heart and emotions into words on a page.

As this strange creature grows and matures it will start to tiptoe into the real world. See, this little self destructive creature wants the world to read it's work, the hope of publishing their book drives them. But you can learn a lot about the creatures personality by what they write, this venerability scares them and sometimes can prevent them from leaving their cocoon.

For this strange creature to mature and reach adulthood it must complete the task of the dreaded first draft. For the tiny creature this will be the biggest fight it will have ever come across. Of course this wont be the most terrifying thing the creature has to do, editing is rumoured to be a dark lonely place what can send this timid creature running to a dark corner to hide. But for the time being, completing the first draft is the hardest thing they will have to face.
Oh but what is right often feels like betrayal.:

For me, I am still dragging my feet through my first draft. Over the time of writing my book I had rewrote it 3 time!!! I am an idiot for doing this. Yet, despite knowing how much of a set back that is and how painful it is to rewrite everything you've wrote so far, the temptation to do it a 4th time is still there. 

I know I haven't mentioned my book for a little while. I think my last post was in October when I wrote about creating an outline for your book. I haven't had too much time to carry on with my book at the moment. Whilst it's my dream to have it published one day, its not my priority right now. Currently I need to be focusing on my college assignments *I says whilst writing on my blog and avoiding the ever increasing list of assignments that I need to so* 

I'm also a bit stuck on my first draft. I know many other writers can sympathies with me when I say that writing your first draft is nerve wracking but exciting and  wonderful. You read your first draft, read it again, then again and again. The amount of times I've read my book is ridiculous and because I've read it that much it seems predictable and boring whats understandable. Despite knowing this, I'm still dragging my feet with my first draft. I've read many other posts about getting through your first draft and I've came across quotes that encourages you to just write. Don't look back, don't edit, just write!

So this is just a little update on how I'm doing writing wise. If you have any advice, that would be really appreciated so come say Hi in the comments. But for now, that's as far as I've gotten with my book.

I will keep you guys posted though.



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Hiya all.

It's been a while since my last post hasn't it?

A lot has been happening in these past moths My life has taken a roller-coaster of a journey. One full of pain and excitement, love, self acceptance, hard conclusions and fear, lot of fear, it's been quite something.

During this time it might look like I've taken a break from blogging and in some ways this is true, I've taken a break from Acting Natural, but I've been blogging more than ever before.

So today I'd like to introduce you to Lost In The Story.

This is my main blog and is the reason I haven't posted in several moths, I've moved sites.

So why have I done this?

Reason one being that as a blogger I've started to expand and grow. I love Bloggers simplicity but as I started to write more I wished for more control of my blog and the only way I could do that was to move platforms. It's been a bit hard learning a much more complex system but I'm loving it.

I've also changed …

Shy girl speaks

In the movies the shy girl will speak.
She'll find a man that understands and she will be come brave.
Clenched hands she will rise to the stage,
Her audience a sea of those who doubted her.

In the movie she opens her mouth and starlight comes out.
An enigma unraveled in the pale blue of her voices.
People sit shocked, unable to move.
They listen to her voice like their new favorite tune.

In the movie she is loved.
They surround her in a summers embrace.
When the day turn grey they rush to her side.
Holding her close, her tears fall no more.

Life isn't a movie though, the shy girl won' be loved.
She will speak of course, but they're not listening.
Her voice isn't going to hold them captivate, no.
There won't be anyone to run to her side.

When the shy girl speaks it will be too late.
They've all gone home.
She knows deep down though, she wasn't welcome to begin with.
Her tears will fall, alone.


Growing up

Now that we've safely stumbled into May it is time for my college course to be coming to an end. My friends are off to start the next chapter of their lives at Uni, some are going to spend a year in full time work and others are taking a gap year to get a deeper understanding of how the world works.

As for me?

I have no idea what I'm doing next.

Sure I have plans and fall back options just encase I don't find something better to do, but realistically I don't know what I want to do.

University is out of the question as I'm not confident enough in my future to get myself into thousands of pounds of debt, I'm not really in a position to pay the several thousand for my discipleship year, nor have I got enough funds to pay for the higher education course that I wanted to do at college. I have got an unconditional offer on a place studying business at my current college for a year, this is just my fall back option though, but I am glad to have it there.

Believe in yo…